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The Spirituality of Parenting

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I joined this thread because I really believe that parenting has a huge spiritual dimension to it. Here we are forming little minds and spirits and it's a huge responsibility. But I've undertaken it, and I hope not to $crew up too badly and I like to hear what other people do in this regard.
Current Mood:
busy busy
Current Music:
American Graffiti soundtrack
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we have been in our new (rented) home for 6 months now and while this is really great, and life is grand, we have experienced sicknesses and had to contend with an infestation and there is a creepy born again christian upstairs. the move-in procedure was horrifying as a result of the owner not actually getting her stuff out when we were supposed to be moving in, and she left a lot of shit too. so it was very confusing and disorganised and we have managed but have yet to get the basement sorted...etc.

i know it's long overdue, but i need some cleansing, protection, good energy charging rituals to get things really "right" around here.

i'm looking at the moon and between now and april 20 is waxing, and between then and may 5 is waning. so i hope to focus on building white light and love and power for the next week or so, then focus on banishing "crud" for the following cycle(probably to include some sage smudging) till may 5 when i would like to have some freinds over for a drumming circle or something of the sort. (or would the drumming be more appropriate on the full moon?).

any
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spiritually, i have had several epiphanies as a direct result of parenting. some were wonderful and some were life changing(of course) and some were downright healing crisises(sp).

does anyone have any thoughts about how children can heal your own spirit...and care to share about how to manage parenting through a spiritual awakening or a healing crises.

i have 3 kids and a husband and i just want to be alone for a while. by that i don't mean an hour. i mean, a couple of days. i have practiced attachment parenting and i run a home daycare, so i'm ready to go away.

...but i'm realizing the nature of ME and my family forces me to reflect on my own truth. it's good and bad at the same time. but it makes me tired to be doing this work and i just wanna SLEEP!!

the dishes are calling and the floor needs sweeping but i will take another nap soon.
bj

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Please vote, each vote counts!

Support the WaterBaby CranioSacral Project!

Hello, everyone - please vote for this project, I entered a national contest to win funding for my project so I can offer free craniosacral services for babies and families combined with the therapeutic benefits of warm water in a community setting.

http://www.ideablob.com/ideas/1225-WaterBaby-CranioSacral-Therapy-

I intend to facilitate a free monthly CranioSacral Therapy clinic for infants and babies at a community therapeutic pool. I live a mile away from a warm, salt-water, solar powered therapeutic pool, and would love for the support to rent this facility each month for a free community clinic.

http://www.ideablob.com/ideas/1225-WaterBaby-CranioSacral-Therapy-

Thank you and Many Blessings, Kara
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How has parenthood changed your spirituality?

When my son was born 16 months ago, I found three significant changes in my spiritual life:

One, motherhood strengthened my faith.  Two, it heightened my sense of responsibility - a desire to serve deity, live as a role model, take social and political action, live healthier and in greater harmony with the earth, all that crunchy stuff.  

Note I said desire... I'm still working on the actual doing.  Parenting a 16 month old is tiresome, demanding work that doesn't leave time and energy for much else.  Which seems to explain the third major change: I feel like my Gods have fewer expectations of me than they used to.  As if to say "focus on the little one.  We're in no rush."

I'm especially interested to know if anyone else has experienced this last bit.  Do you feel your higher power is cutting you some slack?  Or just the opposite?


cross-posted

 
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i found out that i was pregnant while driving a brand new rented sunfire. it was so weird. my rusty old mustang got knocked out of commission by a tap from a poor dude going thru a stop sign and so i got a nice insurance settlement and a used but rust free mom car after that.(white, gutless, 4door)the relevance of this takes shape later in the story.

so, the whole time i was pregnant, i could not get enough sleep or enough to eat. i was emotionally agitated but physically great! did yoga every day and even made my own program which i thought was so good i would share later in life as a yoga teacher(one of the things i want to be when i grow up).
i thoroughly enjoyed and appreciated the midwifery appointments. i also appreciated the level of involvement of my partner at the appointments. i couldn't beleive the attentiveness and frequency of midwifery care. i loved going for care so often. i felt that i wanted to have the baby at home...but our home was not very orderly and not very clean and i am glad i chose the hospital because of that jacuzzi. that was the best.

all night i just couldn't get comfortable. i didn't know i was in labor, it was a familiar problem. then i woke up at 5am and said to dh "i can't get comfortable, every time i change positions then i get cramps" he said "are you in labor?" i said "no!" he said "um, i think you are in labor" i said "no, i'm not!!" he said "yes, i think you are" i said" i can't be, no, i'm not ready!!!". well i was. by 7am i was really "cramping up" and by 9or 10 i was throwing up. yuck. we called the midwife and she had to call us back. she just finished a 24 hour stint at the hospital delivering 2 babies and said that she's almost finished, she would come when she can...call if anything changes. by 11 the labor was pretty strong and contractions frequent, so by 12 we were on our way to the hospital. i was really irritated about the waiting, and the hallway walking (i didn't wanna do) and so finally i got checked out and discovered to be dialated several cms (don't remember exactly) we got the room with the jacuzzi so i spent at least an hour in there. that was bliss. boy did i zone out. that was the BEST part of that labor, man, i love jacuzzis. i had candles and enya played and the lights were low and so was my groaning. my dh was with me and the midwife got some peace too i think. by 3pm my water broke in the jacuzzi and when that happened my head was awash like a big ocean wave on a rock. it was such a rush. then i got fast and started hopping outta that tub like an olympian saying "WHERE'S THE BED...I'M HAVING THIS F**G BABY, NNNNOW!!!" dh is like "huh, wait a minute?" trying to catch me with the towel to dry me off.lol. i hopped up on that bed in a bit of a frenzy and ended up staying on all fours cause the contractions were so fast i couldn't even relax to turn around. the midwife wisely advised me to breathe for as long as i could without pushing. i think, in hindsight it was best that i tried very hard not to push. this let things happen at a more reasonable pace. but then i panicked cause it was more pain than i ever had before and i kind of roared "GET IT OUT, GET IT THE HELL OUT" and the british midwife said firmly" THIS is where we deliver babies GENTLY". that is just what i needed to calm me (or at least to shut me up) and i didn't want my baby to be referred to as an "it" that i needed to "get the hell out" so after that i tried to focus on the task instead of my fear. that baby slid out after 3 or four good pushes. i felt like i just threw up so i squished myself up and then turned around carefully. dh cut the cord and my PINK PINK PINK baby never left my sight while being cared for. i was so shocked at how pink and pretty she was and also how mushy my heart went. i didn't cry too much but i was pretty mushy. like my heart turned from a potato to a bowl of jello. i got goofy and lovey/dovey like i didn't think i ever would. i delivered the placenta shortly after without a hitch and i started asking for food. i inhaled the yucky lasagna and bun and premium plus crackers and licked the crumbs. then i took a shower in the clear stall right at the foot of the bed without help and by 5pm i was looking at my watch tapping my fingers whining "where is our drive? i wanna go home. i'm hungry" our drive came shortly after that and by 6 i was home and by 7 we were eating a lebanese feast that dh and freind went out to get. my g-freind and her 3 kids were at my house and she was gonna clean my house for me but i only gave her time to do the dishes....oh well. the kids thought that brand new baby was pretty neat. a big family feast and off to bed for me. i was too sore to go up and down stairs for a couple of days but then i recovered quite quickly. we had already picked names ....it was gonna be "VICTORIA ROSE" or "RHIANNON TERRA" and it was quite apparant the first day or two that she was not a victoria but a rhiannon. so cute and spunky with a bit of a fiery twinkle in the eye. we knew she was gonna be a real imp. we just didn't realize exactly how bright and energetic till later. in no time at all she was unbelieveably smart, funny, and enjoyable to watch dancing around and talking our ears off.
now she's on her way home from grade 4 and will burst in the door any minute. i better go make a snack.

the next girl will be part 2, i guess
Current Mood:
nostalgic nostalgic
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Happy Holidays to everyone who has or will be celebrating a holiday this season. Today's Winter Solstice, so I'm excited. I'm also a little annoyed, as I am each year, that I've allowed it to get lost in the Christmas chaos. (We, or I, celebrate Solstice and Christmas. My husband's not pagan) I wanted to start a tradition of getting Molly a small earth-centered gift for Solstice each year. This year it was to be a fairy tale book- any one would do, but we haven't had a chance to shop since discovering that we can afford some modest gifts. However, we'll be making baker's clay ornaments tomorrow. Or, rather I will be doing so while M watches from her Bumbo seat.

Meanwhile, her grandparents are showering her with books about Christ. I'm fine with that, as I want her to learn about a variety of traditions, and it's a part of her family. However, it is a wake up call that as she ages, I'm going to have to be much more involved with church and my circle or their influence will be what she learns most. That sounds like I think they are part of an insidious cult- I don't. I just prefer, like any mom, that I she learns alot about my faith. I ranted at length about this in my blog.

Anyone here raising kids in a faith you weren't raised in? Are you encountering problems? I'm afraid as she ages it'll create some discomfort between the grandparents and me. My paganness has never really come up, although they're aware vaguely. Of course it'll become an issue more as they discuss things with M. I hate conflict so I'm feeling anxious a little bit. I am uncomfortable I guess because although a blend of faiths is perfectly comfortable to me, they may be quite offended if for instance, Molly someday mentions that Mama says Jesus is one of many prophets/God figures like Krishna or Buddha. I'm insecure about being seen as a weirdo in the family. I used to be very confrontational and "out of the closet" but as my enthusiadm for attending circle dwindled, it's been less important to me. Now I want to get more involved but it could be weird with family... 

Thanks for letting me vent in a community. I promis I don't want this to become my own sounding board. Chime in with posts on any topic anytime. I'm planning to promote the community a little as soon as i can get responses from other mods to get permission.

What kind of activities are you doing with your kids this year? Is this time of year important in your life at all? Are the holidays religious or family-oriented?
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I finally finished my birth story. (Lins to first part then you can see links to seconds and third parts.)

For those of you who don't know me, it was a very hard disappointing hospital birth, after I had my heart set on a waterbirth at a birth center. Writing is so wonderful. I feel much more like I own the experience now that I've written it. Oh, and a warning, it's wicked long.

Any one else care to link us to or repost your stories?

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Hello! I want to let you all know about The Birth Ecology Project at http://www.birthecology.org - this is a wonderful resource for parents, expecting families, doulas, midwives, and birth advocates. The Birth Ecology Project advocates for a peaceful world through gentle birth and parenting. There is an active online journal with daily postings of articles, essays, stories and more about natural birth and parenting. Check it out! http://www.birthecology.org
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OK, in the great battle of celabrating Samhain vs. Halloween, I think it's like Jesus vs. Santa Claus to me, and I'm choosing Santa Claus metaphorically.

You see, my pagan group has scheduled Samhain ritual smack dab in the middle of Trick-or-Treat. They are apparently less kid-inclusive than they were when I attended circle regularly, and when I tried to take Molly she was a banshee. Of course, she's too young to eat candy, but I'm so excited to dress her up in her little turtle costume and sit outside passing out treats to the older kids. I love trick-or-treat, so I'm not missing it. I think I've chosen before to do family stuff that's oriented around a non-pagan holiday. Like missing winter solstice for an early Christmas party. I guess this is a problem particular to minority faiths or newer religions. I guess the conclusion I've drawn is that my family is more spiritually valuable than our Wiccan rituals. I think I'm finding more and more that I'm more UU than Wiccan. Which is fine. Just thinking out loud. This was going to be a rant about my group being anti-kid but my anger fizzled, sorta. It's annoying, though, because we hardly ever do circle on the actual Sabbat, and the one time we do, they plop it in the middle of trick-or-treat, even though three of us are mamas. I'm going to email the unofficial "leader" of the group to see if the other moms have raised the question of meeting later.

On a note of positivity, the UU congregation is officially a "welcoming" congregation to the Lesbian/Gay/Biexual/Transgender community, so we're having a "Coming Out" celebration Suday a.m. I'm baking cookies:) I love my church.

Current Mood:
giddy giddy
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